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The River by Casey Delano Chac​ó​n

from East French Press: Poetry Power Hour by East French Press

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I sat there in the back of my grandmothers faded blue dodge colt. Questions surfacing in my mind. We were heading to the bay that day to go out fishing on my uncle Bruce’s boat, my cousin Steve sitting in the front seat and I finally mustered you the courage to break the silence, too many unanswered questions and knowing that the elephant which resides in my family room was the death of my mother and the manor of which she had passed. As a child growing up I had always asked and continued to ask and ask...... What happened to my mother? Always getting the same answer, it was a go to brush off where said adult would tell me she passed in an accident, my child followed by my adolescent mind asking myself, what kind of accident? A car, a plane, a train, a hit and run, and I knew at that moment at the CA age of 15 I was ready for the truth. I pushed my grandmother to tell me. To tell me as we sat in that damn little car on the waterfront. To this day I can’t imagine how hard it was for her to bring me up to speed, to tell me the whole god damn mess of it while the tears streamed down her cheeks, down my cheeks, down Steve’s cheeks, and a chapter was closed, and I was changed forever and believed in the grace and the courage of pure honesty.
I found out that my mother had taken her own life by sticking a shotgun in her mouth. And on that day in that beat up blue colt, the summer sun shimmering off that clean blue water of the Delaware River i would be forever grateful for the strength my grandmother had ,to tell me the truth about her own daughter.

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from East French Press: Poetry Power Hour, released April 25, 2021
(feat. Daniel Ray Organ/Mixing)

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